84 lines
6.7 KiB
Plaintext
84 lines
6.7 KiB
Plaintext
{\rtf1\ansi\deff0{\fonttbl{\f0\fnil Helvetica;}}
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\f0\fs24 Scene: Scene 2\par
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Model: anthropic/claude-sonnet-4.6\par
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Character UUIDs: 46F0331E-D357-4989-8FC2-3D7D62BCA2D7,497498CD-85FE-48E9-B852-18E043365DB6,131DF043-CF40-4C70-B3BB-15CABC26383E\par
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Accepted for editing: 2026-08-24T20:07:45-05:00\par
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\par
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### STYLE\par
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The style of the novel is in the style but not substance of Ken Follett. Each scene is in third person from the perspective of one of the characters.\par
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\par
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### LEXICON\par
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(none)\par
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\par
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### STORY\par
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At 5:47 a.m. on a Saturday, seventeen-year-old Ella Hayes \u8212? already dressed in golf shoes and obsessively prepared with a self-annotated yardage book and an hour-long warm-up plan \u8212? pressures her large, unhurried father Andrew into leaving their Pompano Beach canal-side home for a 7:24 tee time, overcoming his deliberate second cup of coffee through persistent argument and a pointed declaration that her rigorous work ethic has made her the better golfer, a claim he does not deny; he rinses his mug and concedes, and she leads them out into the pre-dawn blue-gray air with her bag on her shoulder, the day unresolved but full of competitive promise.\par
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\par
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### CHARACTERS\par
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Andy Hayes\par
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Father and husband. Works as an aviation maintenance technician at American Airlines out of the Fort Lauderdale Airport. Is a union member with nearly 30 years of experience. Scratch golfer. Large extended family, two brothers and a sister live nearby. Tall and handsome. Goes by Andrew (Andy). Tall, handsome, sun-darkened face with a creased look and gray beginning at the temples. Recently started wearing reading glasses.\par
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\par
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Ella Hayes\par
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Oldest daughter. To be a high school senior. Highly skilled golfer looking for a college golf scholarship. Tall, haughty, proud, smart. Prefers male friends to female friends. Has never dated and rarely attends parties or after school activities other than golf. Taught golf primarily by her father, a scratch golfer. Daddy\u8217?s girl. Usually impatient with others and likes to play fast.\par
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\par
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Bobby Carpenter\par
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Best golfer on the boy\u8217?s high school team and Ella\u8217?s perpetual weekend playing partner. Forever in Ella\u8217?s friend zone.\par
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\par
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### RECALL\par
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(none)\par
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\par
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### PREVIOUS\par
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She thought about the range. She thought about the sequence of the session \u8212? wedges first, short irons, then the middle irons, then the hybrids, then driver last, but not too many drivers because this course didn't ask for driver very often. She thought about the thing she'd been working on with her ball position, moving it back a half inch with the seven iron, the way it was cleaning up that occasional thin strike she'd been getting on courses with firm fairways. She wanted to hit at least thirty seven irons before they walked to the first tee.\par
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\par
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"You know," her father said behind her, "when I was coming up, you hit six balls on the range and if the six balls went more or less where you were pointing you went and played."\par
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\par
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"That's why I'm better than you."\par
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\par
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A pause. She did not turn around.\par
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\par
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"That might be the most disrespectful thing you've ever said to me," he said.\par
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\par
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"You know I'm right."\par
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\par
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Another pause. Longer this time.\par
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\par
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"I'm going to finish my coffee," he said.\par
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\par
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"Obviously."\par
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\par
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But when she finally turned around she caught something in his expression before he recovered it, a flicker of something that was not amusement and not offense. Something closer to pride. He looked down at the mug and she looked at the side of his face for a moment, his jaw, the gray that had started at his temples in the last year, and she felt the particular complicated love of a daughter who has been taught by her father to be difficult and precise and uncompromising and who is now deploying those qualities directly against him.\par
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\par
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"Five minutes," he said.\par
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\par
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"Two."\par
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\par
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"Ella."\par
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\par
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"You've had two cups. There's nothing left in there worth saving."\par
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\par
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He looked into the mug. He looked at her. He pushed his chair back with his foot and stood up, all six feet two inches of him, unhurried as ever, and carried the mug to the sink, rinsed it, set it down.\par
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\par
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"Get your bag," he said.\par
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\par
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She was already through the door to the garage.\par
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\par
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The sky outside the garage door, when her father lifted it, was a deep and luminous blue-gray, the color the sky is for only a few minutes in the summer before the light begins its real work. The air smelled like water and cut grass from somewhere down the block. Ella slung her bag onto her shoulder and felt the weight of it settle and felt the cleats of her shoes on the driveway and felt the whole long useful day opening in front of her like a fairway.\par
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\par
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"Let's go," she said, not unkindly, and she walked to the truck.\par
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\par
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### NOTES\par
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Pompano Beach Golf Course \u8212? A frequently played course with Andy and Ella. Two eighteen hole courses, the shorter and easier Palms course and the longer and harder Pines course.\par
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Just after dawn, late May, 2000.\par
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\par
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### BRIEF\par
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This scene is told in third person from the viewpoint of Andy Hayes.\par
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Andy watches as Ella and Bobby get ready to tee off from the first tee. Andy asks Alex where Bobby wants to go play golf in college and learns the boy wants to go to the University of Florida. Ella wants to go to Stanford, which has a fine women\u8217?s golf program. Bobby and Ella are the best players on their high school team and well matched.\par
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Though the girls\u8217? golf team never plays from the back tees, Ella always practices from there when she can. Ella and Bobby go to the back tees, negotiate a buck a hole bet and flip a tee to see who goes first. Ella wins the toss and tees off, hitting an impressive drive right down the middle of the first fairway. Bobby, taller, stronger, tees off, hitting a perfect drive 30 yards past Ella\u8217?s ball. Bobby makes a snide comment and Ella huffs. Their fathers tee off from the white tees and off they go.\par
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Both fathers are good players, but they are playing for the fun of it, whereas Ella and Bobby are out for blood. Bobby has a natural advantage as he\u8217?s stronger and hits the ball farther, but Ella has a wonderful short game and that makes their matches more or less even.\par
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On the green, both kids have birdie putts, Bobby the longer of the two, so he plays first. He makes his putt, but Ella runs hers into the hole as well, so they\u8217?re even after the first hole. It\u8217?s clear that both kids have brought their A games to the course. Their fathers are already debating how early they could get away with ordering beers from the cart girl.\par
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\par
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### DIRECTIVE\par
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Expand to a maximum of 1500 words. Keep it fun with snarky dialog between Bobby and Ella.\par
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\par
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### SCENE\par
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} |